Thursday, May 27, 2010

The I Am Nots

I find myself saying the weirdest things throughout the day.  Interestingly, most derive from having to explain to my children that while, yes, I am a super hero akin to Inspector Gadget, I am certainly not [insert whatever role they're trying to pin on me at the time] thankyouverymuch.

Heard in the Looney House in the past 24 hours:
  • I am not a chew toy. Please stop gnawing on me.
  • I am not a trampoline. You're not going to bounce very high.
  • I am not made of glue. That paper is not going to stick to my face, I promise.
  • I am not magic.  The pretzels are gone.  Like, really gone.  I can't make them come back.
  • I am not a mind reader.  Please stop shrieking and tell me what you need.
  • I am not a plant.  Pouring water on my head will not make me grow.
  • I am not a Sherpa.  Please, please carry your own shoes.  And walk.
  • I am not blind.  I totally saw you wack your sister in the head with a spoon.
(And these weird things don't even take into account the "Don't lick the dishwasher," "Please get your hair out of your nostrils," and "No, you may not serve yourself cereal in your shoe" comments that roll out daily, too).

Being a Mom is certainly never boring.


  1. yeah we throw around a lot of I am not DEAF, I know your voice and I know your brothers voice...sorry dude THAT was you.
    not to mention the not blind cause I saw your lips moving.

  2. Love this picture!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Agreed - especially about the shrieking vs talking thing. I have gotten to the point with Abby that I will not acknowledge her if she won't use words. We even know the sign for "word" so that I don't have to talk to her during one of those fits.

    LOVE the picture - too cute.

  4. What i truly love is that we often dont even notice we have said some of these weird things until someone else over hears us and make a comment about how weird a thing to say that is.

  5. Hey, your house sounds a LOT like my house! Just yesterday I certainly said: "I am not a trash can" and "I am not a jungle gym". Also, I recall "stop giving me bunny ears" and "I would like to look nice for more than 5 minutes, so please take your hands OUT of my hair." I'm "squashedmom" from Twitter and followed you here. Come visit me on my blog, too. Also let's see if we can find all 7 dwarves....and why hasn't Snow White finished vacuuming yet?


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