Friday, June 14, 2013

New(ish) Blog

I'm coming back here, I promise.

But for now, I've got a little side project going on in these parts... for this summer, (and maybe beyond), I got the hair-brained idea to go (semi) screen-free.

So we handed in our cable box, hid the iDevices, and started searching for new ways to occupy our time.

And to jump start my creativity in blogging, I thought I'd document it a bit.

So, for the summer, check it out: (Semi) Screen-Free.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Tasty Babies

So, like nearly every mother in America, I attempt to get my kids to eat healthy foods. My oldest two are pretty good at trying and liking a variety, including the green stuff, and the third is coming along nicely in their footsteps.

But Z? Haha. At 19 months old he has PREFERENCES. He will not touch a stalk of broccoli, but he will eat a suspiciously grey piece of lint he got off of the floor. Why are kids so weird?

Anyway, I've resorted to dark measures to get veggies in that kid. Before I had children, I vowed to never be a slave to characters or marketing. My children would be immune to the sly ways of advertisers! They would make choices based on carefully weighing the pure, naked facts! Stick it to the man!

Now? Now I'd gladly pay for a stalk of broccoli if Elmo's face could be superimposed.

I learned recently that Z, despite being fairly new to the world, had definite preferences to what he wanted and didn't want to eat. I also learned that he was an early slave to packaging. So, I used that to my advantage.

I found that he enjoyed eating those fruit pouches, (ah, food pouches... Another post in and of themselves. Amaranth? I think I was 29 before I even had heard about that grain. Anyway...) And I found that he was far, far more excited about the once that had a happy, smiling fruit like the one on the right in the bottom photo.

"Hey Z! Want the happy fruit pouch? Look! He's smiling at you! Happy tasty fruit!" Inevitably, this question was met with a grin and a nod. Win!

But I ran out of those pouches. I had plain ones and this one with a... Baby on it. Z was flatly uninterested in the plain one and in desperation, I pulled out the one with a baby on it. "Look Z! A baby! Want to eat the one with the baby? Mmmmmmm, tasty babies!"

Somehow the translation from a tasty, happy apple to a tasty, happy baby didn't quite work. I'm apologizing in advance to the mothers I meet who will inevitably raise their eyebrows when Z toddles over and asks, "Eat? Eat tasty babies?"

Oh motherhood, you win.

Monday, October 1, 2012


I posted this on facebook this morning and decided that since I've been promising to blog, the first step should be to, you know... actually blog.  

Anyway, the following is a little postcard that Lexi(6) penned to her friend Hannah. She handed it to me and ran off to play. 

It was only as I was about to put it into the mailbox that I suddenly became concerned for Hannah... seems as if Lexi is developing some sinister tendencies. 

I'm thinking it'd be wise for Hannah to choose to come over and play. But I also think she might want to bring a helmet.

Friday, September 7, 2012

Uh, August? Where'd Ya Go?

So, I apparently haven't blogged since the end of July. Which means one of two things... either I got kidnapped by aliens who took away all of my internet contact so that I could help them to discover how to make eggplant into something remotely palatable.

Or... I was busy actually doing things instead of writing about them. I used to laugh when people would say that, convinced that I was managing to do both. However, the more kids I had, (and the more the littles liked buttons), the less time I had to actually write about them.

So, I'd text myself with random words or catchphrases to remind me to blog when I reached a time when I wasn't falling into bed totally exhausted shortly after my kids.

Except now I haven't the foggiest as to what my code words mean, so I guess I'm starting from scratch?

But, thankfully, my kids never stop being ridiculous, so there's always fodder for a story.

Today, it's my dear second born in the spotlight.

Last Sunday, we went out to lunch with Shaun's parents. They brought a friend from their community so he got to witness firsthand what chaos we bring to a dinner gathering.

(In reality, the kids are generally well behaved... but there's four of them and they're rather exuberant).

The sweet waitress noticed my kids were getting antsy and brought them each a little bit of tortilla dough to mold and shape like play dough. This worked for quite awhile. But then they were putting it on their faces, which was actually hilarious as well. Caly walked over to the end of the table where our guest was sitting and before I could say a word, she attempted to get the dough to stick to his arm. Good-natured about it all, he said, "Ah, it won't stick there because of the hair." She held the dough for a split second before plopping it directly on his head.

His very bald head.

I think I gasped in embarrassment, but he laughed and congratulated her on her quick thinking. Thankfully.

That kid. Geez.

Friday, July 27, 2012

You'll Look Twice at That Dropped Potato Chip

The county built a beautiful new park nearby and my kids and I had been itching to go. However, I don't function in heat, (read: I turn into a melting grouch who whines for iced coffee and a cabana boy to fan me in the shade), so we'd been putting it off for awhile. But a streak of 70 degree days had us scrambling to meet a friend and her two kids for a playdate in the sun.

The kids had a ball running around and trying out the new equipment. They only came to ask for food about 11 times instead of 235. An aside... what is it about going places that makes kids "hungry?" You know they're not hungry. You know this because they ate a full sandwich, yogurt, a pound and a half of fruit, and 37 pretzels before they left the house.

Around the 11th ask, it actually was lunch time, so we staked out a shady area on the turf, not far from the base of one of the slides. The kids happily munched away while we moms chatted.

A few minutes into lunch, inevitably, the newly potty-trained Sayer abruptly stood up and announced, "Mama! I have to pee!" I turned away for a second to put my sandwich down and said, "K, bud, let's go to the--"

I turned back around in time to see that my dear, sweet son had dropped his drawers right where he was standing and was happily creating a nice puddle of pee at the base of the slide. Horrified, I turned towards my friend whose eyes got wide. The two of us started shaking with laughter as we stared at S who was completely obvlivious. 

And of course, this was the longest pee of his life. Or maybe it just felt that way.

Cheeks burning and tears of laughter rolling down my face, I couldn't even look up to see if anyone else was watching. S finished his business, yanked up his pants, asked for "sanny-tize" and sat down expectantly.

I hurridly grabbed two half empty bottles of water from the stroller and started splashing them on the wet spot on the astroturf. This did not help the moisture problem. I now had the beginnings of a bigger puddle, this one of watered down pee.

Of course, I looked up to see a few moms who were staring at me funny, probably wondering why a sane looking woman was dumping bottles of water onto the ground at the very bottom of the slide. I caught the eye of one woman and quickly stepped in front of the emptying bottle to hide it from view and then waved.

She just stared. Which made sense because not only was I still obviously dumping water, but now that the bottle was behind me, it looked as if I was the one peeing all over the place.

The bottles emptied and I decided that nothing more could be done.

But when my daughter dropped a piece of apple onto the turf and made a motion to pick it up and eat it anyway, I may have ninja chopped it out of her hand.

Because REALLY, who KNOWS what people do on that ground?! Sheesh.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012


We all have those days. Those days when you've given a thousand kisses. When everyone is hanging on you, needing attention. When you've hauled around a toddler who seems allergic to the floor. There are those days when everyone wants something, anything, everything. And there's only one of you for a thousand needs. There are those days when the house is a mess, the kids are a mess... when you are a mess. When you have nothing else to give and you're empty, wanting to shout, "NO MORE!" with your hands over your ears.

And those little faces look up expectantly, so you don't.

Sometimes... sometimes those days come with rewards.

Sayer happened to be the last one to go to bed tonight, due to a late nap. As he wandered into my room asking, "can we just stay awake for a whittle bit more? And den I'll go in my bed," I asked him if he wanted to rock in the rocking chair with me like we used to do when he was younger. Smiling, he climbed into my lap, all solid arms and strong legs. He tucked his back against my chest and we grinned at our reflections in the mirror across the room.

I remarked to him, "You're getting so long! When you were teeny tiny, I could fit all of you on my lap."

He nodded seriously and said, "Yup. I am big. And Mama?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"When I get even bigger and bigger and bigger? And when I'm bigger than you and you're little?"

I smiled at the thought, "Yeah?"

"When I'm that big, I can snuggle you up on my lap and rock you and protect you from all the monsters." He patted my leg.

I had to swallow a lump in my throat as I snuggled him close. "You will? That's very sweet, buddy."

"Yup. Because Mama? That's what you do for me 'cause I'm little."

Indeed it is.

So, those days when you don't know if you can give anymore... Those beautiful kids that you pour all of your love, affirmation, encouragement, and belief into? They fill up and a little of it spills over and back into you.

And you can thank God for the reminder that your efforts are not in vain. That they hear, absorb, listen and know your love.

So, draw strength and carry on.

Monday, July 16, 2012

Kidisms - Episode # 11209

Driving in the car the other night, Sayer was nearly asleep when an ambulance drove by, lights flashing, siren wailing. He immediately gasped and shouted, "MOM! Did you SEE that?! I just saw... I just saw... I saw an ALIEN!"

"An alien?"

"YEAH! It had shiny lights and sounded like this, 'A woooooo woooooo!' An alien!"

I grinned, "An ambulance?"

He grinned back, "Yeah! An... annnn AM-BU-WANCE!"

I love kid mispronounciations. You'd think they'd disappear as the kids got bigger, but Lex had one of her own the other day that had me rolling in laughter.

We were at a minor league baseball game waiting to let the kids run the bases. Along the field line, they had a few staffers in super hero costumes, which of course, delighted my kids.

We recognized Batman, Superman, and most of the usual ones. Then there was a guy in a green costume, carrying a bow and arrow.  Lex wasn't sure who it was so she asked her cousin. She came back to tell me what she found out. "Mom, that one over there is Hot Guy!"

I tried to swallow my laughter and asked her to repeat herself.

"Hot Guy! Tucker told me it was Hot Guy! I like him and his bow and arrow. And I totally got to high five Hot Guy! Awesome!"

Michelle and I giggled and then Michelle said, "Hawk Eye?"

Lex looked at us strangely for laughing and said, "Yeah! Hot Guy! Hot.. Eye?"

"Hawk Eye."

"Oh! Hawk Eye!"

Very glad that was far more benign than it sounded.

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